Tag: Disabilities

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Disability is Ok!

I once wrote about my pastor’s son going to St. Louis for some specified surgery to relieve spasticity related to cerebral palsy (CP).  He is doing very well and the doctors are extremely pleased with the outcome. Pastor said something about it in one of his sermons which sincerely hit home with me. In preparing to make the trip from Searcy, Arkansas to St. Louis, my pastor asked his son if he was still feeling good about the pending surgery. The response was positive and then further explained: “You know daddy, I’m really not that disappointed with the life I have now.” Dad was dumbfounded!

Those not having to deal with disability in the first-person (they themselves afflicted), often try to push or force “cures,” “healing processes,” or the latest technologies on to those they care for.  For certain, this desire to see a son, daughter, brother or sister cured of their disability stems from a deep, sincere love.

Sometimes though, as stated above, people with disabilities are satisfied to live the life that has been dealt them.  It’s not that bad.  Our desires to see improvements in the quality of life of others are good, commendable and probably natural, especially in the eyes of loving parents.  And, even though parents often know what’s best, it is a good idea (most of the time) to include “everyone” in the decision-making process.

Discuss disabilities with loved ones.  If they are comfortable with life the way life is, it may be best to simply love them like you always have and leave well enough alone.  Just some food for thought!

Thank you for your support. Feel free to call us or email us for copies of brochures like “The Spirit of Volunteerism” or “Faith In Action Caregivers Alliance” that were produced by employees with disabilities right here at Mays Mission.

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Exposure Breeds Comfort

For many people who have little exposure or experience with a disabled individual, the initial focus of the new relationship, unfortunately, is on the disability. As we have come to know, getting truly acquainted with someone takes much more than concentrating on physical characteristics. Focusing on the disability instead of the inner-beauty and personality causes uneasiness. A true and lasting relationship will take much longer to develop. If the disability is deafness, you may become very self-conscious about what you are not saying or communicating with your hands. If the disability is blindness, you may become self-conscious about pointing or saying phrases such as “see you later,” and so on. The truth is that you will probably be uneasy until your relationship has had time to develop. Focusing on a disability will only cause delay in your maturing relationship. Consider this, that you too, must be yourself in order for the good and healthy relationship to properly develop. This is true of all relationships, not simply with the disabled. In a “normal” relationship, factors such as gender, age, race, and physical features seem very pronounced when we first meet. These features quickly become secondary, and we eventually lose awareness of them completely. The same can and should be true when getting to know the disabled. Be at ease. Be yourself. Treat your new-found friend the same way that you would like to be treated. That’s the best way to develop and nurture a relationship that is long and lasting.

Please feel free to share in the comments section. If you would like more information call us at 1-888-503-7955 or email us at info@maysmission.org and thank you for supporting people with disabilities!